Words cannot describe what a wreck I have been for the past 10 days.
Not to be dramatic or anything, but 10 days ago I went for my screening mammogram and have been an absolute, neurotic mess since then.
The boob squooshing was bad enough. Honestly, boobs weren’t meant to be flattened like a pancake. My boobs have grown considerably (along with the rest of my girth) since I had my first mammogram (diagnostic – age 29 – false alarm) and second baseline mammogram (age 38), so you would think that would make the procedure easier, but it seemed to hurt more. I have to wonder how they do this procedure on women with small breasts? Seriously, how do they manipulate the small breast that’s high on the chest into that god awful contraption? I guess this is where it comes in handy to have big, saggy boobs, getting saggier every day.
As we finished up and the technician and I exchanged pleasantries, she handed me a piece of paper and told me I could expect my results within 30 days. 30 DAYS? I exclaimed bordering on hysteria. “You can’t be serious.”
She looked a bit pained as she raised her eyebrows and said “They’re really busy upstairs.”
The voice inside my head screamed, “Well, get them on the horn and let’s put a rush on mine, you can code it NEUROTIC FREAK for all I care!!” This thing is digital now, I assumed that would speed things up. Apparently not. I guess coming in October, Breast Cancer Awareness month, wouldn’t lend itself to speedy results.
I think the woman saw how distraught I was by this nugget of info, so as I left, she whispered sheepishly, “I…I think it’s more like 10 days…”
So, that night, I drove home, swearing to myself on how ridiculous it was that it would take a month to get back results and obsessing on how I was going to get through the next month without having a nervous breakdown. Kind of hard to forget about it when you are prone to hypochondria (that's right - I own it) and it’s Breast Cancer Awareness month. Pink items everywhere. Grocery checkers asking if you’d like to donate. Huge spreads in magazines about celebrities who are survivors (which helped immensely, actually).
I don’t mean to be dramatic, but I’ve been so distracted by all of it. Do I have risk factors for breast cancer? Not really. I’m 40 and overweight, but no family history and minimal birth control pill usage (scant evidence of connection there). Still.
“Negative,” was what I heard this morning. Long pause. “That’s a good report, “ the lady added.
A more beautiful word has never been uttered. Have I mentioned how much I don't enjoy being 40????
That's not to say that I don't think everyone shouldn't go out and get screened. If you are over 40, you should most definitely get screened. If you have a family history, you should try to get tested for the gene mutations and start screening early. No question. But unless this is CSI and we're doing harcore DNA testing, a person should not have to wait more than 48 hours for test results of any kind. It's just cruel. (Diagnostic results are immediate, for the record)
3 comments:
Wow, that would get me going.
Around here (at least the clinic I go to), the results are within 48 hours, BUT my technician told me on the spot that all looked good and she'll see me next summer.
We do have the newfangled technology (supposedly the machine they use is only in about 10% of radiology labs so far), so that might make a difference... who knows.
Glad everything was ok! I went to the doctor today and he asked me when my last mammogram was- I was a little offended since I am about to turn 30 and have never had one. He said "oh, yeah" but I came home asking my hubby if I look 10 years older than I am. Doctors just have no idea how cruel they can be ;-)
Melissa -- ouch!! Doctors are clueless, for sure!!
Shelli - My hospital is supposed to have the latest and greatest too. It touts all this on the website, so I sort of expected more immediate results. Not so. And the technician wasn't telling me anything, total poker face!! I'm just glad it's over...
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