Chugga Chugga Shoo Shoo

So I finally had a weekend where we had absolutely nothing on the schedule. Gorgeous weather and a clean slate, perfect. Naturally, I had to come up with something for us to do.

I decided it was time for the boys to experience the zoo. Judging by how unglued they become even driving by a random dog or horse (we live adjacent to a rural area), I figured they'd enjoy seeing some big game up close and personal.

All in all, it was a perfect day. We saw giraffes, lions, tigers, zebras, monkeys, lizards, snakes, birds and flamingos. We ate iced cream. We rode the merry go round. We took a train ride, felt the perfect 70 degree breeze whipping by us and listened to William exclaim "Shoo Shoo!" (as in Chugga Chugga, Choo Choo) the entire ride. You don't get much better than that.

They even had a little kid ride area, but the boys were too small to ride most of them. The boys got a thrill out of the merry go'round, so it all worked out perfectly. They were all really well behaved (for the most part) and good about being out of the stroller. They didn't bolt like their big sister did at this age. The boys are different. They're very busy and wild, but they like to stay close.

Way Back Whensday - Summer 2007

Dateline: Summer 2007
Sofia's age: A little over 2 yrs old
Place: "The Lion Park"

I love this picture of Sofia. She looks so happy, but has a glint of the blossoming devilishness that I have come to know and love (not always, but most of the time.) I'm having a really hard time with her lately. She has just gone off the charts with the sass and willfullness, so it helps for me to look back and remember these less emotional, drama filled days. I love this girl with all my heart and soul, but she brings new meaning to the word "precocious" lately. Payback. Total payback.

Also - regarding the aforementioned preschool teacher with the Playboy shirt? She gave notice today. I was actually a little sad because she brings warmth and laughter to the school and I know Sofia will be devastated, but life goes on, I suppose.

Ethel and Winifred

Sofia and Bella, doing their schtick. They were at times, the best of friends, at other times, bickering like little old ladies. Hence, the Ethel and Winifred nicknames. Here they are, hanging out in Ziva's pack 'n' play, talking penguins (pin-WONS)

The Boyzzzz

The weekend was great. Busy and sunny. Productive. Perfect.

It's All About the Princesses

And finally, some Disneyland fluff. Not much as I left my camera in the suitcase the first day and had to buy a disposable, but you get the idea. :)

So That's Why I'm So Aggro

Well, I'm still feeling grumpy, but today got my period, so that may be a factor. I wasn't keeping track, but it feels a bit early. Like, a week early. Dear god, I hope I'm not perimenopausal. *gasp!*

Since I'm in such a funk, but want to post something, here are our Easter pictures! Most of the weekend was quite lovely, until 5 p.m. Sunday. :)

Way Back Whensday - Cabo 2003

Dateline: February, 2003.

Place: Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

Context: I had surprised Steve with a Valentine's Day trip to Cabo that Christmas of 2002. He surprised me, right after Christmas, with an engagement. This was on our Valentine's Day Cabo trip, taken on the balcony of the wonderful hotel we stayed at. We had such an amazing time. It floors me to think of how different our lives were when. Back then, it was all about the cats and planning the big wedding which would take place later that fall.

The signed wall photo was taken at the Hotel California in Todos Santos, Mexico.

Haircuts and Racing Thoughts

Oh yeah, did I mention the boys got haircuts?

I tried a local place and wasn't that impressed, but whaddyagonnado. It's a boy haircut, nothing to get too worked up about. William's hair was quite spastic at first and it appeared uneven, but now that it's had a day to settle, I'm liking it. David's even came out sort of cute. I told her I didn't want the bowl he always ends up with and she used thinning shears to avoid that problem. :)







***

This week's going to be a busy one. My neighbor (the one with 4 under 5) invited me to go with her and a group of ladies to a speaker at the library on "Positive Discipline." I figured I could use a little of that. Things have reached an all time high of tantrums, mommy losing her temper, more tantrums, time outs and over and over we go. We have three things going on this upcoming weekend - a kid birthday party, my sister in law's surprise birthday party and Baby Loves Disco on Sunday. I also have to have "The talk" with my sister in law to tell her we're cutting back on her watching the boys one more day (used to be 4 days, has been 3 days, needs to be zero days, but will be cut back to 2 days for now.) I gave her a head's up this was coming about 6 weeks ago, but I know it's still going to be an unpleasant conversation.

We have property taxes due and I'm trying to to have mini panic attacks. I have yet to start on the Wellbutrin because there was an issue with the way the doctor wrote the Rx (2 times a day vs. 1 time a day) and she's yet to get back to the pharmacy. I haven't pushed it because I was trying to see if I could just get by without it, but it's not looking good. I'm feeling sadder and more fearful by the day. I am having more catastrophic thoughts. I have been having dreams about dropping William in a sewer and not being able to get him out because his head was too large to fit through the sewer grate. And catching him before he fell off a high dresser to serious injury. My latest one is what if something happened to me? Steve has life insurance, but I don't. Then, I start thinking about putting everything in a trust and getting a will and who would we pick and they'd need to keep the kids together and how do we pick XYZ without upsetting ABC and vica versa and my head feels like it's going to explode with all this weighty responsibility. Ugh.

I think back to when I was single and didn't have a pot to piss in. Living paycheck to paycheck. Paying my bills, living on my own, working 7 days a week sometimes to make that happen. I wasn't nearly as freaked out then and I had no reserves to fall back on. But I did have living family and didn't have 3 kids. Now, my father is gone and that security blanket is gone and I'm finding it terrifying.

Time to get that Wellbutrin filled. Ya think?

And Xanax does nothing for me. It's akin to having maybe a glass and a half of wine. I'm sure if I was in full crisis mode, it'd come in handy, but for the most part, it just makes me tired and that doesn't really do me any good.

Manny Alive

So yesterday, my Manny husband took it upon himself to take all 3 kids to the store, to the park and to the beach.



This was sans strollers, just him and him alone. OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.



I tend to get a little overly cautious when it comes to the ocean, based primarily because I grew up and live near some of the most gorgeous but treacherous surf in the country (a wind surfer died a few weeks ago at our beach, no lie.) I was not happy about this development.



Thank god I didn't know or I would have had a panic attack. Seriously, the boys are at the age where they don't understand they need to stay on the sidewalk and don't always listen or stay with you. All I kept picturing was one of them breaking off and him being in a terrible predicament. I appreciate his overconfidence, but taking 3 little kids to the beach by yourself is just not safe and I told him so. I made him swear he would not ever, ever, ever take them to the beach alone again.



In any case, looks like they had fun.



ETA: A few people have pointed out that it appears my little William is enjoying a hooka pipe. Rest assured, he's just doing his nebulizer treatment, like a PRO!

Dos Poops

Don't have much to say today, other than the fact that today was much better than yesterday.

I spent almost 3 hours last night listening to David scream and tantrum, presumably from lack of nap. By 8 o clock, I was beyond frazzled and really frustrated.

Today was an improvement. I took the day off, went on a field trip with Sofia's pre-school class and David pooped TWICE. I don't think he's done that since he was a baby, so *thumbs up* Miralax!

Here is a great embaress you when your older shot of David, putting on Sofia's sparkle shoes. He loves her princess Belle ones as well, but haven't captured that on film yet. Note the way he's holding the phone as well. I almost always am on speakerphone, so he has adopted a sort of scream into the receiver mode of talking of the phone. Yet another reminder of "you are on stage."



And William, looking eerily like Sofia with a bow in his hair.

Missed it By a Hair

So, I didn't make it to the next level. Passing point to be invited on was 82%, I got 80%. It sucks to get that close, but in all reality, it was probably more than I could take on and whatever is meant to be is meant to be.

This doesn't mean I'm not disappointed - I am - I had a good cry and am trying not to let it eat at me - but just have to keep moving forward and be happy I'm still currently employed. (knock on wood)

And today is 80's day at Sofia's pre-school. This meant she got to wear a dress, leggings, leg warmers and jellies to school. Needless to say, Sofia was a happy camper this morning.

Playdate Birfday

Today, I hosted a playdate birthday celebration for the twins. Their birthday is not until Sunday, when we'll have small, family gathering. I tried to keep it simple, but of course, at ten minutes before it started, I was cursing myself for ever trying to do such a thing as I was surrounded by clingy kids and attempting to decorate and frost cupcakes. David was whiny hiney and Steve had to leave to do some last minute stuff with our house (tenants move in Sunday.) All in all, we had about 6 two year olds, plus the boys, plus Sofia was home, so you can imagine the level of chaos. Good chaos, though.



I love this card one of the mom's made. She's so cool, a filmmaker/photog from L.A. who also has written a children's book. I think she captured "the brothers" quite well, dontcha think?

Way Back When-esday -- Dr. Phil & Patches

Dateline: May 2007 - the boys were 8 weeks old

I remember this was when we were starting to come out of the awfulness. I was beginning to see a glimmer of hope in the sea of despair that had been the twins' first month or so. I was beginning to have fun and enjoy my boys. With the exception of a few moments, it just got better after that and continues to do so.

William was sporting a serious Dr. Phil hairline and David (left) had major excema on his face. That is what I remember most. The scaly patches and trying to get rid of them. Poor little fella. He definitely inherited my Celtic sensitivities. You can see it on his forehead, if you look really close. I remember the only thing really working to eliminate it was Aquaphor.

Weekend Pics: The Fashionista & My Little Nurturers

So, just you have an idea of what I'm referring to when I tell you that Sofia has been fighting me on what she will wear on a daily basis...

She typically picks things that are highly weather inappropriate. Like this little get up. Mind you, it was 50 degrees outside and pouring rain. Yeah...notsomuch!
(and that is a piece of the leggings I cut up a week ago or so. No matter how hard I try to get rid of the remnants, she keeps finding them and including them in her signature look)



And later in the day...William and David attempting to "feed" their babies. It's really cute, actually. Sofia never showed this kind of interest in nurturing her dolls at this age. (Not to compare, but I just think it's interesting that the boys are doing this when she did not)





William kissing his "baby"



And the inmates running the asylum



A surprise visit from the cousins - age 5 and 3.



Between Steve and his brother, there are 5 kids under 5 in the family.

Way Back Wednesday -- When Mommy was Skinny

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Dateline: December 1998
Place: Office Christmas party at a local restaurant


In light of my apparent complete non interest in Weight Watchers the last few weeks, I thought it was time to bust out with some pics to inspire me, motivate me. Hence, the skinny, twentysomething, single Melissa shot.

I thought I was so bad ass here, with my black tights, black mini, festive cardigan and (out of shot) Kate Spade bag. Good times.

My Cute Purse

I was just tagged with the purse game, so here goes.

I go back and forth between carrying a purse and one very large (but cute) diaper bag.

I am embaressed to admit this and I can hear an audible gasp from Michelle in New Jersey from here, but I bought this bag at Long's Drug Store for about $20.

The best part? You would not believe the comments I get on it. I get raised eyebrows and "Hmmm...someone's been shopping..." and "Ooooh, cute purse!" comments all the time. Clearly, people think it's expensive. It is a knock off of expensive looking purses, made in China, probably dipped in lead, but that's ok. I mean, it's not really ok, but will do for now.

Beach Boys

Let's see if this works.



Some pics. Steve actually had the bravery to take the boys to the beach yesterday, by himself. That would have sent me into nervous spells had I known he was doing it, but ignorance is bliss and they seemed to have a lovely time.

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Alpha Taurus Pt. II

Perhaps I am not the Alpha Taurus after all.

Costco and Cat

So, here are the boys at Costco.

Jen, to answer your question, it's the food. The free food.

And here is Miss Thang with the cats. This is momentous as the grey cat (Trixie) has been hiding in the closet for almost 4 years. To see her and Sofia bonding is a beautiful thing indeed.

Treasures For the Taking

The aforementioned baby gate. It is now a primary climbing device. As you can see on William's face, he takes the whole concept quite seriously.


The dollhouse Sofia brought for Christmas. The boys are digging it. You may notice that my boys still use binkies. That is something we need to work on, one of these days, when I am feeling strong and invincible. Not sure when that might be, but it's on my t0-do list.




On my quest to reign in spending, I was able to use a Visa gift card today at the supermarket (more on that later) and use a free sandwich coupon I had for lunch. I am also hitting the thrift stores now regularly, since finding some great treasures last week.

Sofia's room is coming together. I still haven't bought her a big girl bed, but considering she still fits in this one, her room is small and cash is tight, we probably won't until we have to.


I found this chair out by the dumpster at my office. It's an Osh Kosh kid's chair that someone left. It had many stains on it, but I brought it home, fumigated as best I could and threw a fitted bed sheet over it. I was psyched as I've been looking for one of these for a long time and one of this quality would probably cost $50. Free is good! Thank you, universe, for putting it out there for me to find.

I found these little chests at the thrift store for $5 each and fell in love with them.





And Sofia with her "butt butt" Mango. Good times.