Her and I used to be best friends (she was my maid of honor and I hers) but drifted apart after our weddings for reasons I can't even begin to get into here. The long and the short of it was that I wasn't fond of her boyfriend (now husband) as he has profound emotional issues & baggage. While I felt badly that she'd made this choice for herself, I didn't necessarily want to get sucked into all the drama. After my wedding, I consciously drifted away from her. She came to showers & we exchanged the occasional email, had lunch a few times, but nothing more than that.
She had a pretty hard time of things with childbirth, laboring for 18 hours before having an emergency c-section. The baby had turned into a facial presentation, from what I understand is extremely rare and very dangerous. I think the whole thing was exhausting and scary. My friend is on the frail side (chronic migraines, tired, sleeps a lot, etc) so I knew she was probably having a hard time of it. I was right.
I went to visit her yesterday and while she seemed in good spirits, she seemed to be in a bit of pain. I asked her if she was at least on some good drugs and she said just Motrin and Tylenol. Oh dear, I thought.
She had told me earlier in the day that the baby's latch was great, wasn't losing a lot of weight, yada yada. When I went to visit, they came to weigh little K. and discovered she'd dropped about 8% of her body weight and were going to "talk" to her about supplementing. I remember that talk so well. The whole thing brought back a lot of memories. Sofia lost closer to 10% of her body weight and I panicked. Supplementing is a slippery slope, but you have to do what you have to do.
I found it very odd that her husband was not there. He apparently wasn't feeling well and was at home. (Seriously? At home? Now I remember why I don't like this guy) I got the sense that he was just overwhelmed from "all the stress." Oh boy! A lot of help he's going to be. Red flag! Secretly, I guess was glad he wasn't there (as his presence is off-putting to me) but sad for her.
My friend is a GRADE A Control Freak and Know It All, which at times is incredibly helpful, at other times, not so much. There was a moment when the baby was fussing quite a bit and she was holding her, trying to get her to calm down and she looked at me for guidance. It's so out of character for her, it really threw me off, although I guess it would make sense.
She looked a bit panic stricken, like "What do I do now?" and I was a bit thrown. "Oh...uh...she probably needs to burp...or be swaddled...or maybe nurse some more..." I offered. I distinctly remember being in the hospital on the second night and having Sofia wailing and not being able to stop her. I started crying and the nurse came in, swaddled her tight and she immediately stopped. I remember at that moment being so thankful that I was staying for 4 days as if I'd gone home that night, I'm not sure I would have known what to do at all.
All of this brings back memories of those early days with Sofia. Those were some good times.
Pure Bliss here
Pure Exhaustion here
Pure Perfection Here
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