Clearly, I'm no superwoman

So, it's not been the greatest week for me at work.I screwed up a few major items and completely forgot about a meeting yesterday -also forgot to tell the assistant to come to the meeting. Fortunately, my boss had mentioned it to her.

I've been with my company (a local real estate firm) many years (12 - was their first first time employee, they have about 40 now) and most of the time, do the job on autopilot. It's not even that busy and my primary role is supervisory. Truth be told, due to the level of activity, we probably could do without one employee, but hell will freeze over before I share that with anyone. So, bottom line, I don't do much at work every day. It's been like that for a few years and I've been so busy TTC or pregnant, that it's worked out very well. I hang out, make sure everyone does what needs to be done and assist my boss as needed. She's not there much of the time, so...you get the idea. It can be boring at times, but with the priorities in my life shifting so drastically lately, boring is good.

I've been having great difficulty focusing on work while there. While I don't necessarily do much, I still am responsible for making sure things get done, ordered, followed through, etc. and my mind is swimming with thoughts about my kids and all that needs to be done at home. It takes all I can do to get to work on time. In fact, most days I am up to an hour late. In my former life, I was obsessively on time or early, certainly never late. Now, it's all I can do to get out of the door. I get up early and it still takes me a full 2 hours to feed all the kids, dress all the kids and get myself ready.

So this week, I was reprimanded by my boss for coming in late, leaving early, letting things fall through the cracks, etc. I copped to it and it was fine. She needed to say what she needed to say and we both felt better afterwards.I did express that I was having great difficulty balancing the kids with work but assured her I'd be making a concerted effort to improve in those areas. Truth be told, I have been milking it at times, but in fairness have had a lot of issues arise that have been out of my control (doctor visits, hospital stays, etc.) I did manage to get to work on time the rest of the week, for the first time since I started back in September. My boss said something like "We used to have a good thing going..." and that made me sad. We did have a good thing going for several years, but I have 3 chidren now and things will never be the same. Priorities, b aby.